This is an email. It is intended to be used only as an email and not
for any other purpose. Any use of this email for purposes other than
the intended purpose shall constitute a misuse of this email and may
subject the offender to penalties described in circular E-307.
If you receive this email in error you should notify your email
provider, the sender, the intended recipient and your local
Postmaster. There is no requirement to notify the NSA because they
have already received a copy of this email.
If you do not receive this email, you should report that fact to your
local Postmaster, your webmaster, if any, and MasterCard International.
If you are the intended recipient, and if you are pure in spirit and
mind, you may read it, but if your security clearance is below
“Destroy Before Reading” you are not allowed to remember the contents.
If you find the contents of this email offensive, you are not allowed
to open it.
There are many more pertinent regulations, but we are only allowed to
spend 45 seconds on each customer. You are therefore referred to Circular 308.
Have a pleasant day.